"By practicing presence, we not only take more in, but can also give more. By making every moment conscious and decisive, we take responsibility for our actions and effects. Learning to better understand, accept and even love the natural self can help heal the feelings of inadequacy and insecurity that are a cause of most self destructiveness, escapism, depression, sexism, neighborhood violence, war, and global destruction. Learning to intimately reconnect with the natural world can lead not just to a more satisfying life, but to acting in our own individual ways to protect, restore, resacrament and celebrate that diversity and wildness. When we sense at the deepest levels that we are connected to all that is, we experience helping the world as aiding our own extended selves. In the state where we are most alive, we are also most connected, empathic, grateful, caring and able." (Jesse Wolf Hardin)
That day came, unexpectedly. Anima had pretty much gone off my radar, brushed aside into the nether reaches of my brain, until one quiet summer day on the west coast when, as I sat staring at a map of the United States and figuring out my travel route, I suddenly realized that I would most likely be driving through New Mexico. I google-mapped Anima Lifeways. Well, knock me over with a feather. It was pretty much directly on my route. Way the heck in the middle of nowhere, yes, but close enough to call 'direct' for my purposes. I emailed them.
A week later I received this response: "We aren't generally offering retreats anymore but could make an exception if you feel drawn to spending time with this special canyon sanctuary."
Hell yes! I emailed a lengthy application and then promptly forgot about it.
...Until I was in Los Angeles a couple of months later, and it occurred to me that perhaps I should verify whether or not they were actually expecting me. I emailed, and a week later received THIS response: "Sorry, I have been torn as to what to write you! We are swamped with projects, with Kiva and Wolf racing on deadlines, so you would only be meeting me, either benefitting from the solitude or maybe helping me with homestead chores. I'd be happy for you to experience this magical canyon, if you would be fulfilled by it and not disappointed by the shortage of interaction! Let me know, dear! Elka."
Attached to the email were logistics and instructions on how to get there and what to pack. They asked me to give them several days notice before my arrival.
Which brings me to November 24...Phoenix, Arizona. Several days' journey away from Anima Sanctuary, I sent off an email saying I was on my way, and...heard nothing back. So I stayed an extra day in Phoenix. And another. Still no response. Deciding to head out anyway, I detoured through the beautiful red sandstone landscape of Sedona and spent the night sleeping in a Cracker Barrel Restaurant parking lot. The next day...no response.
Throwing caution to the wind, I figured I'd just show up. This trip IS about "winging it", after all!
Now what you must first understand is that in this case "just showing up" involved the following...
First, drive 5 hours from Sedona to the very small town of Reserve, New Mexico, and then follow these instructions:
A week later I received this response: "We aren't generally offering retreats anymore but could make an exception if you feel drawn to spending time with this special canyon sanctuary."
Hell yes! I emailed a lengthy application and then promptly forgot about it.
...Until I was in Los Angeles a couple of months later, and it occurred to me that perhaps I should verify whether or not they were actually expecting me. I emailed, and a week later received THIS response: "Sorry, I have been torn as to what to write you! We are swamped with projects, with Kiva and Wolf racing on deadlines, so you would only be meeting me, either benefitting from the solitude or maybe helping me with homestead chores. I'd be happy for you to experience this magical canyon, if you would be fulfilled by it and not disappointed by the shortage of interaction! Let me know, dear! Elka."
Attached to the email were logistics and instructions on how to get there and what to pack. They asked me to give them several days notice before my arrival.
Which brings me to November 24...Phoenix, Arizona. Several days' journey away from Anima Sanctuary, I sent off an email saying I was on my way, and...heard nothing back. So I stayed an extra day in Phoenix. And another. Still no response. Deciding to head out anyway, I detoured through the beautiful red sandstone landscape of Sedona and spent the night sleeping in a Cracker Barrel Restaurant parking lot. The next day...no response.
Throwing caution to the wind, I figured I'd just show up. This trip IS about "winging it", after all!
Now what you must first understand is that in this case "just showing up" involved the following...
First, drive 5 hours from Sedona to the very small town of Reserve, New Mexico, and then follow these instructions:
"About 8 miles out of town the road passes a small sawmill and crosses a bridge over the San Francisco River. Turn right on the very first dirt road, only 30 yards past the bridges, and just before the big Gila National Forest sign. |
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Oh my my my.
Here are photos of my trek through the canyon, which involved fording the freezing cold creek SEVEN TIMES with my skirt hiked up around my thighs, a backpack on my back, and a bag in each hand. It was very quiet in the canyon as I walked. The sun was getting close to setting, and it was becoming chilly. I walked barefoot, pushing my cold, wet feet back into my shoes when the burrs and spiny weeds were too much for me, then kicking them off again when the path crossed the water, stepping into shockingly cold water up to my knees and wading through. The water felt wonderful. It was so clear I could see every little stone and grain of sand. Coyote paw prints led to the edge and disappeared. The sand felt gritty under my feet, giving way under my toes in a way that felt life-giving after a month of pounding the pavement and cement of the big cities. |
After making the final river crossing and following the path up the hill, the first building I came to was a cleverly built composting outhouse, which I was incredibly grateful to make use of, tottering up the broken ladder and squeezing in, backpack and all. I continued hiking up a steep hill, loose rocks falling away beneath my feet as I panted and wheezed my way up. At the top I saw, thank God, a cluster of handhewn log cabins and outbuildings, an outdoor kitchen, sheds, and a large and neatly stacked woodpile, as well as a few old but tough 4x4 vehicles. Smoke drifted from the chimney of one building that was slightly larger than the others. I followed a sandy path lined with smooth rocks, through a clearing with an outdoor bake oven, and approached the wooden door. I could not see through the small window, but I could hear voices faintly behind the door. I raised my fist, hesitated a moment, then knocked. The voices stopped. I knocked again.
The door opened a crack and a woman in a floor length plaid dress and apron peered warily out. "Hi!" I said. "I'm looking for Elka." "Yes, I'm Elka..." "I'm Arjenna!" I received a blank stare. "I'm from Canada and I'm on a roadtrip.... We were emailing..." Another blank stare. "You said I could stay for a few days in exchange for doing some work?" Elka looked thoughtful. "Oh....wait...your name sounds familiar...I think I have your application somewhere on my desk..." Desperation probably tinged my voice. "Um, is it ok if I stay for a few days?" I sure as hell wasn't going to walk back down the canyon in the dark. "Well, yes, that's fine," said Elka. Pause. "Are you ok for food? I'll send Rhiannon with you to show you to a cabin. You could maybe come back up here around 10 tomorrow and I'll find something for you to do?" |
Rhiannon, a pre-teen girl with long black hair and a gothic looking black dress led me nimbly in her bare feet down a narrow path that switch-backed down a cliff and wound through the forest to the guest cabin. Any misgivings I had evaporated as soon as I saw the cabin. Rhiannon prattled away about how to use the wood stove, refill the water jugs, and use the one solar powered lamp. Then she took her leave, and I was left with the deep silence of the canyon, and my meager container of cold, leftover soup. As the darkness moved in, I quickly realized the one tiny lamp was not sufficient to do anything by, so I got a roaring fire going, and sat eating my dinner by the fire. Sleep came quickly, snuggled as I was under heavy blankets and thick down comforters on a foam mattress in the loft.
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Elka would often come out part way through and offer me some gifts of food...a jar of homemade turkey soup and dumplings, an onion to cook with, a small jar of sea salt mixed with fir needles. Mid-afternoon she would come tell me that I didn't need to work anymore. Then I would go for short hikes, clean up my cabin, get more stuff from my van, or cook dinner. In the early evenings, when it was dark and I was cleaned up and I couldn't see enough to do anything more, I would read. In the cabin I found stacks of what appeared to be old book manuscripts. Short essays, mostly. Some written by Kiva, or Elka...most by Jesse. Flipping through them, I got sucked in - not only by the beauty of well-written prose, but by the beauty of these people's lives and thoughts. I know these people now. Not really, because two of them I didn't meet and two of them I barely saw, but I have seen where they live, I have seen how they live, and I have heard their thoughts as if I had spoken with them. I know the intimate details of their daily lives, their connection with leaves and flowers and trees and rocks, and I have heard their voices speak love over each other in the pages of their writing. There were published books too. Compilations of interviews between Jesse and other herbal healers, medicine men, foragers, published in book format. Hundreds of interviews. I sat for hours each night, immersed in the gritty, day-to-day lives of people as varied and interesting as you can imagine - lovers of plants and of people, committed to healing and to loving. And then I would sleep. And wake up. And start over.
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On the fourth day I took my leave, and walked back down the canyon with all my possessions on my back. A little calmer; able to breathe a little deeper. Ready to head out on the next adventure.
The People of the Canyon
Photo credits: www.animalifeways.org
Links
Anima's website provides crucial insights, practical skills and usable tools for living more healthy and conscious, meaningful and mission-filled lives... teaching plant medicine, nature awareness and deep-living skills that further self empowerment and reconnection, purpose and calling, wholeness and satisfaction
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Kiva Rose's exhaustive writings, scientific material, and searchable herbal remedy databases. The site that originally led me to Anima Lifeways. Peruse or search the site, or sign up to receive blog posts.
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How to make infusions, salves, fermented drinks, poultices, etc...from the Animal LIfeways website.
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Beautiful well-crafted writings on "a Wonderland of topics from a wildly Nature-informed perspective". Sign up to receive emails when new work is posted.
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“This is the first publication I’ve seen in my 38-year career that captures the wild diversity of herbalism in North America while still reflecting excellence and high-level practice… points of view from many regions, traditions, and schools of North American thought.. for the practicing herbalist from entry level to advanced, inclusively.” (Paul Bergner, North American Institute of Medical Herbalism). Download a free sample copy from the website!
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